Laura Shapcott

Week 2 Monday - Friday

Sun, 22 Mar 09 20:52:35 +0100

This week hasn't been the easiest week in the world and a lot of things have happened and changed at the dream centre.

Day 8 - 9/3/09
There is a lot of speculation flying around at the moment with regards to the finances of the Dream centre and a lot of the nurses are getting angry and frustrated. We heard on friday last week that there might be a strike today and when I woke up this morning there was a huge group of nurses protesting at the front of the building. As a group and with the advice of our regional we decided that we too would not work and for most of the morning we watched the strike/protest develop out of a window at our flat.
At first we weren't sure what was happening on the wards but, we asked one of the nurses who said that there is a staff nurse (the nurse in charge) and a ward nurse on each ward, which meant that the patients were still getting their medication and some level of care.

Day 9 - 10/3/09
The nurses were striking again today, but Margo, Petra and I decided to help wash the patients as normal (still only 2 nurses per ward). It was tough because there was more to do than normal, but the nurses were very grateful for the help.
There's one patient who doesn't like to have a shower and would rather have a bed bath, but this is not good for her, especially when she is still capable of washing herself. I spent a lot of time with her last week and she would only let me shower her. There's a new patient whose blind and has very deep wounds all over her body, so the nurse and I soaked her in a special medicated solution.
I also managed to spend some time with the staff nurse on 5th floor who told me about the various injections that the nurses are able to give the patients to ease their pain or administer treatment.

I didn't feel too great when I went back to our flat and had to lay down for a few hours. After lunch I decided to make banana bread for the patients to have at bingo night.
When it was time to collect the patients for bingo night, the nurses were behind on their schedule.. so to speak.. and they needed help feeding some of the patients so we were late starting the evening. The Banana bread was just about ready to serve at the end of the evening and was a great success with the patients :) It made a change from the normal, chips (crisps) and chocolate.

Day 10 - 11/3/09
Today was volunteer day, where the Be more volunteers in the Durban area have the opportunity to visit some of the other projects. We had a reasonably early start and our first stop was 'the tree' which is part of the Bobbi Bear project. The tree is a meeting place for women, men a children once a week, where they sing, prey and tell their stories. There is also the opportunity to receive basic medical care and supplies and I helped one of the bobbi bear volunteers clean a very bad dog bite. The dog bite occurred in november, but because she's unable to get regular transport to hospital to have it cleaned properly, it has become badly infected and almost surrounds her leg just above the ankle. Apparently I saw it on a good day, so goodness knows what its normally like, because I've never seen a wound as bad as that one. She was obviously in a lot of pain and can only walk a couple of metres at a time, which also makes catching a taxi to the hospital very difficult. The bobbi bear volunteers and a 'nurse' advised her on how to keep it clean when she cant get to the hospital and they are in the process of trying to arrange weekly transport to get her proper care.
After the tree we had a tour on Mother of Peace, which is a home for children who have been abused or orphaned. They also arrange school transport for those who are old enough and run after school and homework clubs. Its in a beautiful area and the children are given a great support network.
After lunch we met with Jackie, the founder of Bobbi bear, who explained to us what her project involves. They help young children who have been sexually abused and ensure that they have sufficient medical care and preparation if the case goes to court. They also educate children about HIV and AIDs, which is not an easy task because they are not allowed to mention anything to do with sex and can only describe it in terms of body fluid. Jackie had devised a very clever interactive program which uses puppets and fabric objects to make it easier for the group of children to understand how HIV is spread and what it does to your body. Its an amazing project and Jackie is a very inspiring woman, who knows how to get things done and makes a huge difference in the lives of the children she helps.
Before dinner we also visited Isiaiah 54 (a temporary home for abused/orphaned children) and Umthombo (a shelter for street children during the day, a source of medical care and helps children go back home).

For dinner we went to the cape town fish market at Uskaka, which was a good opportunity to get to know the other volunteers better and tell each other about what we've been up to at our projects.
It was a very exciting and very long day, but well worth it and i'm looking forward to going to Drakensberg and Lesotho this weekend with some of the volunteers from other projects.

Day 11 - 12/3/09
Its difficult to know whether to work or not because on one hand we support the nurses on strike and don't want to do anything that suggests otherwise (ie working) and on the other hand we don't want the patients to suffer. Instead of helping to wash the patients this morning I decided to go and talk to the patients. I went to see the patient on the 5th floor who I helped shower on 10th (the lady who would only let me take shower her)... her bed was empty and her name washed off the wall. This normally means that the patient has passed away and one of the nurses confirmed this. She was very sick, very thin and in a lot of pain but that didn't make knowing she had passed away any easier.

I also went to visit Thandi on 4th floor. The nurses moved her last week to room 401, which is where the very sick patients are. All of the patients know this, but the nurses didn't tell Thandi why she was moving, so she automatically presumed the worst. The nurse told Malou and I that she hadn't been taking her mediation and wasn't looking after herself properly and they wanted to move her somewhere they could keep and eye on what she was doing.
When I went to see her today she was in a very bad way and in a lot of pain. Its almost as though she's given up, she has no family and I don't think she feels as though she has any reason to fight anymore. It was her stomach that was the problem and after massaging her back, I finally managed to get her to sleep. Its really hard to see someone that was once such a strong person (like she was when i started at the dream centre) give up hope like that and the fact that she has no family, made it that bit much harder.

Day 12 - 13/3/09
Thandi was much worse today and I decided to spend most of the day with her. She has no one and I didn't want her to feel as though she was being left alone. She kept saying how much she appreciated me helping her, which kept making me well up. She's talking differently now, almost as though she's saying good bye and Malou and I keep telling her that she's a strong person and that she will get through it. She was in so much pain today and despite being incredibly tired, she couldn't sleep. It was only when I left her at 7.15 that I think she finally managed to drift to sleep.
I cried properly for the first time since arriving at the dream centre this evening.. I was scared that she wouldn't get through this infection and that she maybe wouldn't last the weekend... I didn't want to go away and I think all of the emotions from the last to weeks had been building up and everything with Thandi had toppled me over the edge.

Week 1 - The weekend

Wed, 18 Mar 09 15:13:59 +0100

At the weekend me and the other 4 volunteers went to a Zulu village and experienced Zulu dancing. I'd seen this when I was in south africa in July, but it was done and explained in a different way and there weren't as many people watching, so it was much more personal.
We also took a short walk to a waterfall in the valley of 1000 hills and the gorge it had calved through the landscape was massive! I'm afraid you'll have to wait for pictures as the computer i'm using is not the fastest one in the world!!!
In the afternoon we went to an indian market, which sold lots of african crafts and after lunch, took a nice relaxing stroll down the beach, to the african street market. This is part what south africa is all about, walking along the beach, watching the sun go down and looking at the local craft. There were people along the beach who had made huge sand sculptures - I've only ever seen them on TV before and in the flesh they are much more impressive.

The sea was incredibly rough and the back set of waves were forming tubes. There were local surfers jumping off the end of the pier to get to them and there was one surfer that was taken out on a jet ski. The atmosphere on the pier was amazing - there were people fishing and everyone said hello and stopped for a chat. A lot of people presume that south africa is a very unsafe place to visit, which is can be, but it can also be a very enriching place to go - its very difficult to describe.

On sunday we spent the morning on the beach - the sea was still very rough and there was only a small strip in which you could swim, but that didn't stop me. The waves are so powerful here that you don't even need a body board to go body boarding, you just have to lunge forward and the wave does the rest. This was not the most sensible thing to do in a bikini and I almost lost it a few times, which was quite embarrassing.
On a sunday there is a flee market about half way down the beach, so after lunch we walked to it. There wasn't a huge amount there, but there were people selling spiced fruit, which gave the whole market a lovely smell. I have to try so hard not to buy things and I keep having to remind myself that what ever I buy I have to carry on my back for the next 5 months - This is not an easy task, as everything is sooooo cheap, but i'm not doing too badly.

Week 1 Monday - Friday

Sun, 08 Mar 09 21:05:18 +0100

Hi everyone
Sorry for the long wait, but I decided it would be better if I told you about the whole week at once, rather than you having to check what I've been up to everyday!!

So here it goes:

Day 1 - Monday 2/3/09
I should probably begin by saying how huge the Dream Centre is, I never imagined it would be in such a big building.
We (the volunteers) are staying in a flat on the 1st floor, its not the most pleasant of places and there was a mouse in the hall to greet us when we arrived...
After unpacking, Nadine and Marlou gave us a tour of the wards and introduced us to the patients. It was quite a shock to see people so young looking so frail and I didn't really know where to look or what to say.
Not all of the patients are bed ridden as some of you may think and many of them walk around freely with a smile on their face. Thats not to say there aren't some very sick patients here and Marlou and Nadine say death is a regular occurrence.
We also met with our regional manager, Tamara, who told us that there are financial problems at the Dream Centre and that last week it was put up for sale. No one knows whats going on and what will happen when or if the Dream centre closes and I will keep you informed on what happens.

Day 2 - Tuesday 3/3/09
This morning we got up early to help wash the patients, I was shocked by how little dignity the patients were allowed. The patient Marlou and I helped wash didn't even have soap, she only had a flannel that was falling apart and she had to dry with her dirty pyjama top.
After all the patients had been washed, we helped change the beds. Many of the patients have no control over their bladders and bowels, so a lot of the sheets were dirty and wet.
We have to wear gloves and an apron, but unlike in the UK, we dont need to change them between each patient and infection control is practically non existent. This really shocked me, especially since the AIM of the dream centre is to help the patients ward off their current infection, so that they can go home, not give them more.
Today we also met with the coordinator of the dream centre, who explained the structure of the Dream centre staff and a bit about what HIV is and how it develops into AIDs.

Every tuesday evening the Be more volunteers run a bingo night for the patients who want to come. This week there were about 55 patients that came, which is quite a lot considering there are only around 80 patients at the Dream centre. It was really nice to see the patients enjoy themselves and see them get so excited about winning a small bedside clock, a pair of socks and even a small sweet. These things are nothing to you and I, but to them they mean everything and I think the idea that they won it gives them a sense of achievement, something they wouldn't get if we just gave the items to them.

Day 3 - Wednesday 4/3/09
On monday, wednesday and friday morning some of the volunteers run a physio class for the patients. Keeping mobile is very important to the patients as it means they have more of a chance of being allowed to go home. I was surprised how many of the patients managed to do the exercises with weights and how determined they were to complete each set of repeats. I also liked the way the other patients helped those in wheelchairs to get to and from the class and that they know how important its is for them. There is one guy who has is own language... its not Zulu and it certainly isn't english - but he's always smiling and willing to help, that everyone understands him.

Afterwards Marlou and I went round some of the patients and did their nails and gave feet massages. It was a great way for me to get to know the patients, because I didn't feel as though I was invading their privacy and some spoke freely about how they felt and how long they had been at the Dream centre. I really enjoyed doing this and was shocked that something so simple could make someone so happy.

In the afternoon I went up to the ward on the 6th floor and took photos with some of the patients. They really like having pictures of themselves, so with some of the money, be-more gives the dream centre every month, we get the photos printed off and give them to them.
I spent some time on my own with the patients this afternoon, which was nice because I didn't feel as though I was following Marlou/Nadine around (they've been here for 2 months) and I'm beginning to get a feel of what the next 3-4 weeks will be like.

Day 4 - Thursday 5/3/09
Today was the hardest day so far for me. We got up early again to wash the patients and started on the 4th floor with a patient called Gladys. She is very unwell and can hardly do anything for herself, she had soiled her self and it was our job as volunteer to clean her up before taking her to the shower. There were 3 patients in the same bathroom and the door was wide open. The patients really have no privacy here and it upset me to see that they are not even allowed to have a shower on their own (except with a nurse/volunteer to help for those who are less able).
There's a patient called Thandi, who's on the 4th floor and she wasn't very happy this morning because she'd been told she was moving room and she didn't want to leave her room mates. She was also moving to rm 401, which is where the sicker patients are and was scared about what was going to happen to her. Compared to some of the other patients she looks reasonably well, but the fact that they were moving her scared me because she might actually be much sicker than she seems.
She very scared and upset and started crying, because the nurses hadn't told her why she was moving and I could feel myself welling up. On the way back to our flat, Marlou asked the nurse why she was moving and she said it was because she hasn't been taking her tablets and she's not looking after herself, so they want her somewhere they can keep and eye on her.

Having had an eye opening morning, I decided that I wanted to do something a little less emotional and went to help the pharmacist count tablets. A lot of the tablets come in tubs of 5000 and they need to be divided into packets of 100. It took me 1hr15, to count 40 packets of 100, thats 4000 tablets and by the end of it all I could think about was numbers.

Every thursday we have a movie night for the patients, sometimes the film is a success and other times lots of the patients leave after they've had crisps and a drink. Tonight it was definitely a success. We showed them "Little Man" and they couldn't stop laughing.
Before we could take some of the patients down they needed to have their nappy changed. Its weird having to change a nappy on someone who's only in their 20's, wearing a nappy is normally something you would associate with babies and the elderly, but at the Dream centre, its common practice for those who are bed ridden.
One of the new patients, Mbali, didn't feel very well at the beginning of the movie, so I took her back to her room. Having finally found her a sick bowl, she began to throw up and I was really worried because she couldn't stop shaking, so I went to find a nurse.
It was coming up for home time and most of the nurses were ready to leave. There's no over lap of care at the dream centre so they only response I got was "what do you want us to do, all of the patients are chronic". This made me really angry and I went back to the Mbali and sat with her until she was ready to go to sleep.

Today was probably the first of many hard days to come and I doubt today was the worst of what I'll see.

Day 5- Friday 6/3/09
Today we held the physio class in the garden under the tree and even some of the new patients came. There are a few patients who have had a stroke and as a result have very little movement on one side. The other volunteers have shown them that they can use their able side to move their less able side and its quite funny (in a good way) to see them doing this in the physio class, especially one of the men, who over exaggerates every movement :).
There was a church service in the chapel this morning and even some of the nurses came. There was a lot of singing (all in Zulu, so I had no idea what they were saying), but there was something about the whole experience that made me well up. It was so nice to see the patients and the nurses come together and when one of the men from the church spoke, I saw some of the patients smile and laugh and mean it for the first time.

In the afternoon I went to visit Mbali again, but she was still feeling very unwell and was curled up in a ball on her bed. It was hard for me to see her like this, because yesterday morning she had been sitting up and talking to me with a smile on her face and now she was in so much pain that all she could do was try and sleep. I sat with one of the other patients in the same room and cut and painted her nails. At the beginning she was very shy, but as she began to trust me she opened up and she laughed at how big the gloves were on me (even a medium is huge on me).
In the next room, one of the patients asked me to massage her legs, which I did happily and then said that the lady in the bed next to her wakes up in the night crying because her back hurts and asked me if I would massage her too. Bearing in mind I'd never even given a foot massage before I arrived at the dream centre, it was an experience and a half. She'd taken off her pj top, before I'd even said yes, so it was a good job I wasn't going to say no. It actually wasn't has hard as I thought it would be and it seemed to make her happy so when I'd finished I left her to eat her dinner.

This evening we went out for a meal to a restaurant opposite the dream centre called "Butchers Block" - not the most sensible choice of restaurant for a veggie, but the others wanted to go so I didn't complain. Despite only having a choice of 3 things on the menu, the salad was actually quite nice and we also had a bowl of complimentary chips and vegg for the table. In South Africa they have a drink called a Don pedro, which is ice cream with a choice of liqueur. I chose Kahlua which has a subtle coffee flavour and it tasted amazing.. much nicer than plain ice cream and was actually cheaper :p